Filed under: Uncategorized
It’s been a while since I wrote a blog, but today was one of those days where I rolled out of bed with a little extra assholicness in my blood. The alarm was beeping, the cat was meowing, the sun was coming through my blinds, and I just decided that I was going to be in an angry mood today.
In this blog I will discuss:
Having two jobs and why it sucks.
Michael Vick
Stupid things people say
Pregnant women
Homeless People
Money
President Obama
Jesus Freaks / Idiots
New movies coming out
and exactly what I have been up to recently.
I’ll start off with why having two jobs sucks balls. First, let me say that I loved working in a video store back when I was in High School and college. So a couple of months ago, when my job at the charity I work for cut my hours, I decided the best course of action would be to get a second job to suppliment my income….so I got a job at a video store.
It’s a really retro video store, where they actually still rent and sell a large number of VHS tapes, to go along with DVD and Blu Ray. Most of their business, as I have discovered, comes from selling porn DVDs to perverts who obviously have never heard of the internet. Working in the store is actually kind of a cool job. I don’t really have to do very much and spend most of my time watching movies or sitting on my ass texting people. The problem is that when combined with a real 9-5 job, working 5 hours a night in retail kind of sucks dick. The first hour is brings on a “I should have called out, I want to go home and lay down” mood. The second hour is more about “almost half-way done with my shift, let me find a long enough movie to watch for the next 3 hours.” The third hour is when your back starts to hurt, and your feet start to ache. In the fourth hour you start to calculate the financial consequenses of quitting. In the 5th hour, you start to dread the closing duties, such as counting down the registers and filling out all the paperwork. It sucks and I am too good for it.
I took the job not realizing that I would get a better fulltime offer from a new job within days….so now I have the luxury of being able to quit the video store whenever I want, but just out of a sense of duty, I will stick it out for another month or so, just because I don’t want to be that guy who works somewhere for three weeks.
Meanwhile, I am in the last day and a half of the worst job I have ever had, working for a charity. The pay is shit, the people are pretentious social workers who think they are making a difference, and I have no windows in my office….so I have no idea if it is actually raining shit on my life, like I feel it is. But as of tomorrow at 1pm, I will be a memory for this place… WOO HOO!
Michael Vick
Michael Vick is just a complete piece of shit. Everyone is debating whether or not they should let him play football again, but that isn’t really what they should be arguing. They should be debating whether or not they let him breathing the air on this planet. I would prefer to see him launched into the sun, but that’s just me.
Stupid things people say
This morning my boss said to the girl in the office next to me “How was the funeral?”
Really?
How does anyone answer that question? “Ohhh it was awesome. He climbed out of the casket and did the thriller dance.” or “He hadn’t really rotted very much yet, and the smell was tolerable, so I’d say it was successful!”
Instead, she answered like I thought she would answer: “It was a wonderful service.” Really? I am sure the guy in the casket didn’t think it was so wonderful. Actually, he probably didn’t think much of anything, because more than likely he has been blanked out of existance compeltely and is no longer a centiant being. How can a funeral be wonderful? Unless you’re a morbid creep, funerals suck. They always suck, unless you’re happy the person died.
Pregnancy
Every goddamn woman in my office is pregnant (and no, it wasn’t my fault). I cannot stand pregnant women and how much they talk about their cervix. If I came into this office and talked about my sperm count, or my prostate, or something along those lines…these stupid women would tattle on me and try to make my life a living hell….but I have to listen to them talk about their cervixes and all sorts of other gross shit.
New Rule: If you are more than 1 month pregnant, you must have your face ducttaped shut.
Money
So the economy seems to be improving, which is awesome for me because right now I don’t have any money. I am starting a new job on monday which will pay pretty well, and I have two roommates who theoretically will be paying my mortgage for me as I accumulate bankroll.
You know how you are doing well? When you are drinking gatorade. You never see a homeless man drinking gatorade.
Obama
I fought hard for Obama, and really wanted him to get into office and make a difference….but I must admit, the members of his own party are cockblocking right now. The problem with healthcare and with the healthcare bill is that the insurance companies still get to play a role at all. We need to nationalize the insurance companies and do some sort of thing that switches what their job actually is, because needing insurance is stupid. If people are sick, they should be able to go to the doctors office, pay a flat fee of like 25 dollars and get healed. Maybe 5 bucks per medication as well. Figure it out Cheif.
Jesus Freaks
Last but not least, I must get to the Jesus freaks. Why do people believe in this shit? Why do people get so obsessed with an idea that doesn’t have a shred of proof to back it up.
People say, “well I don’t need proof…sometimes you just have to believe.”
Wrong. When making an extraordinary claim, you must have proof or at least some evidence if you don’t want to sound like an idiot. I could tell you that I have a dragon living in my closet, and you would say “prove it.” I could just come back and say “you can’t prove it isn’t there” and it would be the same argument that people make for Jesus and all those other religions.
People, quit wasting your time. Trust me, you are here for a very short time….so do your best not to murder people and hope for the best, like I do.
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So, tomorrow is friday. One of the benifits of having my hours cut back at my current job is that I now have long weekends (fridays and mondays off). But since I am starting my job at the video store on Monday, I have decided that this is the perfect time to take a nice little excursion to the beach.
So, Wilmington, be on the lookout! I am cruising into town tomorrow morning and will be stopping by all of the usual places. UNCW, Elizabeth’s Pizza, and Wrightsville Beach.
Filed under: Uncategorized
Growing up, I was a big Michael Jackson fan. I still believe that the choreography for Thriller was one of the coolest things I have ever seen. Dancing zombies…you just can’t beat it (pun intended).
Michael Jackson died last thursday, stealing the thunder from Farrah Fawcett. I, for one, was shocked that he died, but the more I thought about it, it really shouldn’t have been a suprise. He was 6′0 tall and 105 lbs. That isn’t healthy, especially for a 50 year old man. He had also been rumored to be under the influence of a lot of prescription medications. Also, you really shouldn’t let pet chimps eat at the dinner table.
I am sad to see MJ go, because I enjoyed his music, but really I am more distressed at the amount of people, not just celebrities, that are dying as a result of prescription meds. You do not need to take pills for every little thing. More and more people treat every problem they have with more and more drugs. Can’t sleep? Pills. Sleep too much? Pills. Too sad? Pills. Too happy? Pills. Stub your toe? Pills. It’s getting ridiculous and more attention needs to be paid to this subject.
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Aside from predicting the Indians to win the AL Central (they currently have the worst record in the American League), I think I am doing OK. The Texas Rangers are doing better than I figured, as well (which is suprising, seeing as how Josh Hamilton has missed a bulk of the season with various ailments).
My prediction for American League MVP was Mark Texeira, and he really has a shot. Right now he is currently 2nd in the AL in Homeruns (20) and in the top 5 in RBIs. He also has not committed an error in his first 75 games with the Yankees.
My NL MVP was David Wright. He currently is leading the NL in batting average, but it looks as if he will miss out on this award to Albert Pujols. The ‘Amazin Albert has 28 homeruns thus far, including 6 multi-homerun games.
Look for some big trades to start happening soon, as teams fall out of contention.
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My favorite time of year is here…the beginning of the MLB season. Here are my predictions:
AL East:
Boston Red Sox
Yankees (Wild Card)
Rays
Blue Jays
Orioles
AL Central
Indians
Twins
Royals
White Sox
Tigers
AL West
Athletics
Angels
Texas
Mariners
National League
NL East
Mets
Phillies
Marlins
Braves
Nationals
NL Central
Cubs
Cardinals
Reds
Brewers
Astros
NL West
Dodgers
Diamondbacks (Wild Card)
Giants
Rockies
Padres
AL MVP: Mark Texiera NL MVP: David Wright
AL Cy Young: Jon Lester NL Cy Young: Johan Santana
AL Rookie of the Year: Matt Weiters NL Rookie of the Year: Kenshin Kawakami
Playoffs: Boston over Oakland
Yankees over Indians
Yankees over Boston
Mets over Dodgers
Cubs over Diamonbacks
Cubs over Mets
Cubs over Yankees 
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I hope you have all been following the Presidential Election. I have been following it closely and, from what I can tell, it’s getting ugly out there. We have attack advertisements from both sides. We have one VP candidate whom I havn’t seen on TV since the convention, and one who is on every news show, every sketch show, and every magazine cover.
Why can’t the real world be more like The West Wing? Arnie Vinick (Alan Alda) and Matt Santos (Jimmy Smitts) were such a great pair of bright, thoughtful candidates. I guess it is too much to ask of our candidates these days.
Meanwhile the economy is in the toilet even worse than ever. At least I am not the only one wondering how he is going to pay his rent next month. Misery loves company, I guess.
On the bright side, though, my Dolphins beat the Patriots 38-13 on Sunday. I guess I can focus on football now that the Yankees are basically out of it and have played their last game in the Cathedral.
I can’t wait for Halloween. I have an awesome costume planned.
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Waking up every day, I jump right onto all of the usual job sites. Monster.com, craigslist.com, careerbuilder.com, hotjobs, etc. Being without a job, especially after having a great one for the last few years, is a pride-swallowing siege which can only be experienced, not explained.
In the past six weeks, I have interviewed at several places, for several types of positions. I have interviewed at an echocardiography place, as an assistant to the marketing director. I have interviewed at software companies and furniture companies. So far, no luck.
My dad always said to ‘make your vacation your vocation.’ Well, for him it was easy. He enjoyed playing with electronics, so he became an electrician for the phone company. Then he started his own business fixing electronics. Simple, right? But what about the millions of us whose vacation involves listening to a baseball game while lying on the beach drinking ice tea (with lemon…MMMM!)?
For the people like us, and me especially, our career aspirations should be to find a job that we can excel at while still being happy. No one really wants to spend all day in a cubicle, but we have to, so we might as well do something we like while we are in there. Thus, that is my true career aspiration. To find a job I like to do, no matter what it is, and become the best at it.
So, while my health insurance has now run out, and my unemployment benefits run out in 4 months, I continue to search for that position. It’s just a matter of getting in the door for an interview at the right time and seizing the opportunity.
Filed under: Movies/entertainment
1. Seinfeld
Really, what else needs to be said? You could go five or six episodes without watching (though you never would) and you wouldn’t miss a thing. It was a show about nothing…literally, and nothing has never been so funny!
2. The Simpsons
TV shows dont stick around for 20 years, have a hit movie, and sell billions and billions of dollars worth of merchandise by accident. Though the show isn’t as funny as it once was, it still has its laugh out loud moments, and still is as edgy as ever.
3. The Sopranos
In the finale`, a car backs over a guy’s head. You don’t find that on many shows.
4. Entourage
Kevin Dillon, the brother of famous movie star Matt Dillon, plays the jealous brother of a movie star. Guess he should have that part pretty much nailed, eh?
5. Curb Your Enthusiasm
Just like seinfeld, only with more swearing. What’s really funny about the show, though, is how realistic the conversations are. That’s because they are not scripted at all. There is an outline for the show, and the characters just ad-lib all of the lines. It’s really quite funny.
Filed under: Movies/entertainment | Tags: Coming Soon, Forgetting Sarah Marshall, Movies
Anyone who knows me would know that I am a movie fanatic. It’s almost as bad as my fanaticism for baseball and pasta.
Here are some movies that I want to see:
I love these types of movies….40 year old virgin, Superbad, Knocked Up…. I think this is going to be awesome. I am planning to go see it Saturday night with my friend Chris, so if anyone else wants to come, let me know!
I realize this could be hit or miss, as it appears to be targeted towards females and/or couples. I am neither female nor part of a couple….but it still looks funny and I want to see it.
Every once in a while, you just need to see Al Pacino kick some ass.
Because Robert Downey Jr. is a great actor when he isn’t in rehab.
Movies I have recently seen that were awesome:
This is a great movie for anyone who considers themselves and intellectual and loves to think philosophically about things. If you get bored easily and can’t appreciate dialog, this is not for you. The entire movie takes place in one room. It’s very original and very thought provoking.
It won best picture at the Oscars. And unlike most movies that win best picture, it was actually good.
Ben Affleck directed this movie and opted not to include himself in it. Best directorial decision he has ever made. His brother steals the show, and Morgan Freeman is awesome in his role, as well.
Filed under: Movies/entertainment
Every year, it is a tradition of mine to purchase the new baseball games on the day they come out, and play them until my eyes hurt.
It used to be quite overwhelming when there would be 3-4 games. This year, however, there are only two: MLB 08 The Show for PS3, and MLB 2K8 for 360 (also available for ps3).
MLB 08 The Show
The first game I popped in was The Show. The first thing I noticed was that you couldn’t edit the minor league rosters without going through a tricky process. You must enter franchise mode, back out, and then you can edit the rosters. This means you can only edit the minor leaguers names with the default rosters. That’s fine for now, but they should patch this.
It should be noted that the player editor/create-a-player is simply insane. It’s almost TOO detailed. You can edit everything about a players face, from the shape of his head, to the droop of his bottom eyelid, to the markings on his mouth, to where his zits are.
Next, I set up my jukebox, and got rid of all of the dumb songs that Sony put on the disk, and selected my 8o-song rock/rap/baseball music play list to play while I navigate the menus. Then I began my first game. Yankees vs. Mets, in Yankee Stadium.
Phil Hughes pitching for the Yankees, Johan Santana for the Mets. The commentators went REALLY in-depth in describing both pitchers, and their work in the previous season. Awesome. Adds realism.
The game started as a real nail-biter. The gameplay is incredibly smooth at 60 frames per second with great animations. The score was 0-0 into the 5th inning. Finally, in the bottom of the 5th, Santana left a fastball over the plate and Jorge Posada hit a pop fly into the short Right Field corner in Yankee stadium and just over the leap of the right-fielder for a solo homerun. The fans went nuts fighting over the ball as a beachball was batted around in the background. The famous Yankee Stadium siren and bells played as Posada crossed home plate and slapped hands with the other players. I was pumped. It was exhilarating…but the fun was just beginning. 1-0 Yankees after 5innings.
In the 6th, Phil Hughes struck out the side, giving him 6 shutout innings, 2 hits allowed and 9 strikeouts. In the bottom half of the 6th, I decided to warm-up Joba Chamberlain, and Matt Vascurgan, play-by-play man, says “the Big Guy, Joba Chamberlain has begun warming in the bullpen” Ut oh!
In the top of the 7th, I struck out batter number 10 with Phil Hughes, and a cut scene played that showed fans hanging up 10 K’s on the stadium upper deck, just like in real life! The play-by-play guys mentioned that it was 10 strikeouts, then showed a graphic with his pitch count. I was at 103 pitches! Wow….i’ve never seen a player get to 100 pitches in a video game before….best of all, the game was moving along quickly, still.
I decided it was time for the big-fella….and summoned Joba from the bullpen, who promptly retired the side.
In the bottom of the 7th, i picked up a few base-hits in a row, and Santana was relieved by Pedro Feleciano. Jorge Posada was the first batter he faced and he promptly deposited his first pitch into the 2nd/3rd row down the left-field line for his second homerun of the game, a 3-run shot making it 4-0. Cano doubled down the left field line on the next pitch, and then Melky Cabrera ripped one into the left field gap. I was all over Pedro Feliciano. 5-0 Yankees.
In the top of the 8th, I walked 2 guys with Joba but got out of the inning unscathed. In MLB 08 the show, sometimes you walk people. The umpire will screw you out of some calls and sometimes the ball will sail and you will miss by a few inches.
In the bottom of the 8th, Alex Rodriguez led off with a monstrous homerun into the left field bullpen area. 6-0 Yankees.
That was the final score. What an exhilarating game! Since then, I have played 4 or 5 more games and my scores have all been reasonable. I lost a game to the Royals, proving that in 08 the Show, anything can happen.
MLB 2K8
I really want to love MLB 2K8. I loved 2K7, especially after they released a patch mid-summer.
The good:
The stadiums are like cathedrals. They are spacious and look fantastic. Every nook and cranny is there. The lighting is awesome and dynamic…they sky of a game starting at 7pm will be fairly dusky in the first inning, and very dark in the 9th inning.
Custom music is there, and it’s awesome. I play the standard Yankee stadium songs for in-between innings at the ballpark in the bronx. Other stadiums get city-specific music. I set up Boston to have only Boston songs play in-between innings.
The Dodgers will have old-school West Side rap between innings. Washington gets “Born in the USA” or “America: Fuck Yea!” in between innings, and so on and so forth…ads a lot to presentation.
Custom player walk-up music is there, too….and it is awesome, too, except that it applies to all stadiums. So players will have their custom music in road games, which isnt true in real life.
The signature styles are AMAZING. Almost every player has one, and the generic ones are improved so much that they look signature.
The new controls are…well…different. The pitching mechanic you will either love or hate. I hate it. It’s hard but I havnt taken the tutorial yet. Perhaps I will grow to love it.
In the field I love throwing with the analog stick, and the fielders are very responsive…almost too responsive, as I have run by a couple of balls in the outfield.
The bat sounds are better, but dont match the bat sounds from the trailer.
My main gripe, however, is the framerate. The game stutters on almost every play. It will look UNBELIEVABLY smooth and beautiful for 3/4 of the play, and then like utter shit for the next 1/4 of the play and the transition….it is almost a game killer, but I am getting used to it.
Gone are fans trying to catch homeruns….in its place is a new homerun camera. It’s not for everyone. I like it on signature-style homeruns, like when A-Rod does his “stand at the plate and watch the ball I just hit the fuck out of with my bat up in the air” or David Ortiz does his thing, or Vladamir Guererro does his. On those, the cam looks cool. So do the replays…
but when Derek Jeter his a galactic homerun and throws the bat like a jackass, it doesnt look right.
I have played some close games but it still seems like 2k8 is plagued by too many homeruns. I am going to mess with the settings when I get home and see how it plays out. I’ll be back tonight with screenshots.
Here is the overall verdict by catagory:
Graphics:
Stadiums: MLB 2K8
Crowd visually: MLB 08 The show
Player Models: MLB 2K8
Cloth Physics: MLB 08 The Show
Player faces: MLB 08 The Show
Lighting: MLB 08 The Show (Even though 2K8 has dynamic lighting, the show looks better)
Gameplay:
Score realism: MLB 08 The Show
Pitchcounts/fouls: MLB 08 The Show
controls: MLB 2k8
Computer AI: Draw–both seem to be pretty good, so far.
Audio:
Commentary: MLB 08 The Show
Crowd : MLB 08 The Show
Stadium noise: Draw —custom music is the only thing saving 2k8 here.
Franchise:
Depth: MLB 2K8 —GM goals, the ability to get fired, hired, etc.
Replay Value: MLB 08 The Show …you can sim games quickly and advance deeper, faster.
Minor Leagues: MLB 2K8 — All 90 teams, a lot of fake names for real players (look for initials…almost entire AAA and AA teams are there), and a bunch of stadiums…though the downloadable content hasnt arrived yet, as was promised.
OVERALL:
MLB the Show 08 wins because it is simply a more finished product, and plays a much better game of baseball. The commentary is insane. The little cut scenes and things like that are awesome.
MLB 2K8 has a ton of potential, but having to mess with sliders 800 times before I can get the game to play a non-homerun-derby 9 innings of baseball is just too much of a pain in the ass for me.
